Fifty Shades of Grey (flooring)

It’s not often that a press release impresses you with a unique idea–even one that’s slightly off. This one that crossed my desk today from Dalsouple Rubber Flooring decisively hits the bar, with a BDSM-fetish conceit inspired by Fifty Shades of Grey.

Key points to note:

  • The flooring comes at a price, but the mind-boggling is free
  • The studding is for your pleasure
  • Arousal causes “physiological changes in the body”
  • You will not be deprived–you will be depraved

I had to edit it for publication, but here’s the original release in all its unexpurgated, uncorrected glory.

Dalsouple’s sexy rubber comes in 50 Shades of Grey 

Is Grey boring? Not if you are talking about latex and rubber flooring. If you don’t like grey, you can choose from almost any colour imaginable.

With French flair and panache and innovative – Dalsouple offers an alluring and attractive, stimulating, if not spicy, range of colours to suit your fancy for any room in your house. It might not be a red room of pain in your house, but maybe you could whip it up in the kitchen or bathroom with rubber flooring or walling in sassy hot pink, tingling tangerine, midnight blue, lusty lemon, ravishing red, luscious lime, licorice strap black,  or … your guess maybe more furtive than ours!

Go ahead and boggle our minds with the colour of your desire at no extra cost! Dominate your room boldly with tantalizing colours designed to stimulate your senses. Lash out and choose from over 30 pleasurable textures – available to suit your passion!

How does that shade make you feel? Dalsoupleicious?

If you could lie on that color and roll around naked, would it do it for you? You could get sexy with these fabulous sexy colours.

There have been studies finding correlations between colours and arousal. For instance, red and yellow are generally more arousing than blue and green, when measured via physiological changes in the body.

Sensory depravation is not in Dalsouple’s mind in regards to colours. Dalsouple is not willing to be dominated by bland colours.

And here’s the rather less saucy image that accompanied the release:


Author: Ben Hourigan

Ben Hourigan is a novelist from Melbourne, Australia. His books Kiss Me, Genius Boy and My Generation’s Lament are Amazon category bestsellers, and are available wherever good books are sold online. Ben also works as an editor, copywriter, and self-publishing consultant at his own firm, Hourigan & Co. For news and book release updates, sign up to his email newsletter.